A change in perspective

The neurons in my brain have been firing at literally 100's of miles per hour this afternoon. (Ok, that's an exaggeration, but I have been about as excited as Lesley Knope when she comes up with a new project, so I figure it's a valid statement.)  I am feeling really inspired today and I wanted to blog about it.

The last few days I've felt a bit down, for no particular reason that I could determine. Maybe it's the sinus cold I'm battling, or maybe the downturn in the recent temperature. Whatever the reason, I just hadn't been feeling that optomistic, and I don't like getting into that funk.

Things started to take an uptick yesterday afternoon as I was getting ready to leave work. One of my co-workers made a comment that the sunset was really beautiful last night. As the days have gotten shorter, the sunset begins before I get out of the office. There is a window behind my desk, and I look out that window several times a day. Last night, I glanced out the window, and I was inspired! The sunset truly was beautiful, with shades of deep pink, orange and even some blue. Between the office and the sunset stands a grove of trees, and the contrast of the dark branches and the colorful sunset was really breathtaking.

As some of you may know, I like to crochet. My grandma patiently taught me how to crochet, and I've been doing so for several years. I've recently began picking it up again as I'm feeling creative and it's a good winter project. Looking at the sunset, I was inspired to search out these colors to make something with them. I haven't decided exactly what I'm going to make quite yet, but I'm excited about the prospect. And all of this because I looked out a window I walk by every day.

So this event got the ball rolling for me, and then today happened.  I was first inspired at our monthly staff meeting. Our company has a president who doesn't live in Des Moines, so he only gets back to visit every month or so. When he is in town he likes to stop by and visit. Today he was in town for our meeting, and he got up to talk about life and his take on things. Our president has shared in the past stories about his grandson. His grandson is autistic and isn't able to speak or communicate in a traditional way. They have made progress with him in the past few years, but at almost 12 he's still had to carry around a large book full of symbols in order to communicate his needs, etc.

Today our president shared an update on his grandson. A few months ago they purchased an I-pad for him, and for hundreds of hours his daughter programed symbols into the I-pad to help her son communicate. Our president shared that his grandson has been able to manuver the I-pad, and in a way it's really helped him to communicate faster. Our president was sharing that recently, he was at his daughter's having dinner with his grandson. Our president was talking with his daughter, and he made a comment that he might take his grandson to the car wash, as that's one of the activities he enjoys. They continued on with their conversation, when a few minutes later they heard a computerized voice come from the I-pad. "I'd like to go to the car wash, please." To think that in just a few months, an autistic boy who couldn't find a way to communicate without carrying around a heavy book full of symbols has found a breakthrough with the help of technology.

This really got me to thinking about what we take for granted and how grateful we really should be for what we have. How a little change in perspective can really change your whole outlook. My mood has been improving throughout the day after hearing this story. I realize that while things may get me down from time to time, there's always something to keep you in the right mindset and to motivate. It's amazing what a little change of perspective can do for your spirit!

As if that wasn't enough, this afternoon I received an e-mail from one of my favorite people in the world, my friend Kim Welch. Kim and I have been friends since we began college together fourteen years ago (crazy to believe it's been that many years!) and she has one of the brightest spirits of anyone I know. Kim is married to my favorite roommate of all time, Chris Welch. Chris and Kim make an amazing, dynamic duo of awesomeness and I'm so blessed to list them among my friends.

Not only are the Welch's great friends of mine, but they are also great parents. Chris and Kim have twins, Ezra and Ella. Ezra and Ella were born prematurely, but that hasn't stopped them in the slightest. Not only are they surviving, but they are thriving! I adore both of them and am always amazed to hear of their latest adventures.

Which brings me to the e-mail I received today. Kim had sent me an e-mail talking about picking up the kids from preschool, and seeing their latest art projects. This week the kids had made reindeer to hang on the wall. Kim sent the following picture along with her e-mail.

Now, looking at this picture you might laugh. I know at first I chuckled at the creativity that Ella displayed with her version of Rudolph. And then I read further. Kim said when she asked Ella why the reindeer's antlers were on the bottom of her artwork.  Ella giggled and said "Those are his feet, silly."

I was blown away by this story! I couldn't stop smiling, and I was reminded of how sometimes kids are the best example of what a small change in perspective can do. I'm so grateful to know I have these reminders in life. If you're ever feeling out of sorts or lost for a purpose, spend some time with a child. I guarantee you will receive some perspective on life and you'll have some fun too.

I hope this post gives you the small dose of perspective you may have needed today. Be inspired, create something amazing, or just do something good for someone else. Take the first step towards something great. And always remember that you always have something to be thankful for.

What I'm Listening to Wednesday (December 7, 2011)

It's another Wednesday, and another blog post from me regarding the music filling my head as I type. My choices this week range from new and popular to gone but not forgotten choices, and a few in between. And I've added them to my spotify "What I'm Listening to Wednesday" playlist, so feel free to check them out.

1. Remember the Time- Michael Jackson.  Lately there have been a lot of shows that I watch covering some of the classic MJ songs. He's been covered on the Sing Off, the X-Factor and on Glee in the past few weeks, so it's been great to revisit some classics from the King of Pop. Sadly, none of these shows have taken on one of my very favorites, "Remember the Time." I still remember this video and could watch it any time. Plus I play this song on repeat regularly. I sometimes have to force myself to change the song, as this one will always be a classic for me.

2. Jingle Bells: Michael Buble' and the Puppini Sisters.  If you haven't heard the new Michael Buble' Christmas album yet you really need to stop what you're doing and check it out. This is some classic Christmas music right here, and it's certainly gotten me into the holiday spirit! Every song on this collection is excellent and sounds both current and timeless. I enjoy several of the songs, but I decided to call out "Jingle Bells" for it's spotlight not only on Michael Buble', but also on an under-appreciated trio called the Puppini Sisters. No, they aren't actually sisters, and their last name isn't Puppini, but that's not important. What is important is their sound. They are a trio of beautiful-voiced women who sing in a throwback style. They blend perfectly with Michael Buble' and deserve more recognition for their own albums. They have their own excellent Christmas album which is also worth a few listens.

3. You Da One: Rihanna. The latest release from Rihanna, "Talk that Talk," is another collection of great pop/R&B songs that showcase Rihanna's voice and that can get the party started too. The album mixes elements from her Good Girl Gone Bad and Rated R albums to great effect. "You Da One" is the first song on the disc and it's a sweet love song to "the one that I dream about all day" and it makes me smile, so that's why I'm including it on my list this week.

4. Dream On: Robyn.  Robyn is a really cool artist from the UK who's got a following in the US, but not enough in my opinion. She's an intellegent pop artist who sings amazing songs that make you both dance and think. She toured with Katy Perry this summer and she released an album called "Body Talk" which gained her a lot of critical acclaim. The song "Dream On" is actually on her 2008 release called "Robyn." I really enjoy the lyrics of the song. She's singing to the freaks, the junkies, the drunks and cowards, etc. She sings to "rest your weary head" and dream on. I like the message of peace that creates in my head.

5. Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow (2011): Amy Winehouse.  I started the list with a gone but not forgotten classic, and I end the list with another. The last album from Amy Winehouse was released yesterday, and includes a few alternate versions of songs from her Back in Black album as well as a few B-sides and non-released singles. The whole collection is beautiful, and the song that is really getting me right now is her cover of "Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow." Amy's talent was truly a gift, and it's still so tragic to think that this will be the last official collection of music from such a young soulful voice. You can hear the pain and anguish in her voice as she sings the chorus of the song. The answer of course is that Amy, we will still love you tomorrow, but we'll miss you terribly too.

What I'm Listening to Wednesday (on Thursday!)

Well, this posting is a bit late, as I went to see Wicked last night and wasn’t able to type up a blog posting once I got home. So I’ll be telling you what I listened to on Wednesday on this Thursday, the first of December.  I’ve once again been listening to an eclectic mix of music, so hopefully one or more of these options will introduce you to something worth adding to your regular mix.

 Here are my choices this week:

1.       Fly- Nicki Minaj and Rihanna.  Nicki just received a Grammy nomination for Best New Artist, and listening to her it’s obvious that she’s made quite an impression on the hip-hop and music scenes.  Nicki is very vibrant, edgy and fun all mixed together.  With her latest single, she partners with Rihanna on a mid-tempo song that shows off more of her heart.  It’s a positive message song about going for your goals, and Rihanna’s soaring vocals on the chorus really compliment the melody and Nicki’s raps. Definitely a highlight from an album full of hits.

 2.       Countdown- Beyonce’.  I will admit that when Beyonce’ released her latest album, “4” I didn’t go quite as overboard as several of the critics claiming it was her best work yet.  However, over the past few months this album has really grown on me and I appreciate the artistic choices Beyonce’ has made as she continues to grow in her career. “Countdown” is one of my favorite songs on this album (after Love on Top, which I can play on repeat for days if I choose to) and the syncopated rhythms in this song get stuck in my head every time I hear it. Plus, the lyric “Me and my Boo and my boof-boof ridin’” is silly and also gets the repeat treatment in my mind.  If you ever catch me nodding my head randomly, it’s quite possible that I’m singing this in my head.

 3.       On the Street Where You Live- Willie Nelson.  On a recent trip to the library I picked up the soundtrack to the movie “Valentine’s Day.” The soundtrack is full of an eclectic mix of love songs, but original numbers and covers of classics.  One of my favorites is definitely the cover of “On the Street Where you Live,” which is famously known from the musical “My Fair Lady.”  Willie lends his unmistakable voice to this classic, and it’s a really lovely version of the song. I can be a sentimental fool when it comes to love songs, and this song just makes me happy. To hear someone sing that they are content just knowing they are on the same street where you live is a very nice sentiment in my book.

 4.       Defying Gravity- Idina Menzel.  Well, I told you I went to see Wicked last night, and this is my favorite song from the entire show. There are several stand-out numbers in the production, but this show stopper from the end of act one always gets me.  The lyrics and message are so powerful, and Idina’s voice is a classic. Putting the two elements together makes for one amazing experience. 

5.       Don’t Stop (Color the Walls) – Foster the People.  I know I posted a song by FTP a few weeks ago, but I can’t stop listening to this CD.  I’ve lately been listening to this track, and it also puts me into a good mood. The song is also used in a commercial, so I hear it on TV as well. I can’t remember the exact commercial at the time, but that isn’t important anyway.  I enjoy the rhythm of this song and the chorus is catchy and repetitive, which means it also gets stuck in your brain.  I wouldn’t be surprised if I eventually recommend every song on this disc, so keep that in mind. Or do yourself a favor and just get the disc now. It makes a great Christmas present!

Image problems?

I realize that I haven't posted anything in a while and I need to get back in the habit of sharing my thoughts on my blog. The holidays certainly did a number on my normal calendar, but they were great just the same. I've got several projects I'm working on at the moment also, so I'm playing the role of juggler here.

Anyway, before I get to tangenting, I wanted to talk about self image. I got to thinking on this topic while Craig and I watched the Victoria Secret's Fashion Show this evening. Craig and I have watched this show every year since we started dating and we're always entertained. We find the costumes and designs to be very creative and fascinating and we also enjoy all of the music.

As we watched the show tonight I kept reading posts from my female friends on Face Book. The show definitely drew a crowd of viewers, but so many of the comments were negative in regards to the poster's own self image. Comments like "I could never be that skinny/tall/beautiful were the prevailing mood, and I became a bit upset seeing all of the negative.

I'm the first to admit that I don't always have a positive comment to say about my body image. I know there are things that I can change, and there are things that I will always live with. A shirt that I like to wear will feel too snug and I'll become dejected. A pair of pants fit too tight and I have nothing to wear. (Not the case ever, as I always have something I can wear, but you know what I mean.) I know these aspects affect me and I also know how to change them. And I also know that I have the power to choose my attitude, and that makes all of the difference.

I have tried a variety of different options in the past to change my image, whether it be a new shade of strawberry blonde hair dye or cutting out all fried foods for a month. Overuse of hair dye made my hair thin out to the point where now I just shave it off, and who am I kidding? I'm always going to have cravings for fried foods.  What I've realized is that it's more important to be concerned with your health than your physical appearance. I've been making small steps toward progress in becoming a healthier person as opposed to a "skinny" person. I know that one effect of choosing healthier options is that I may lose some weight, and that's fine with me. But simply losing weight isn't the goal for me anymore. Being healthy is.

And that's not to say anything negative against people who are skinny. I have many friends who I would qualify as skinny, friends who would fall into the average-sized category, and friends who have some substance to them.  They're all my friends. What makes all of them beautiful isn't the way they look, it's the way their heart projects their soul onto me and the world around them. I've known people who are "pretty" but have a soul as black as the midnight sky. I've known people who'd never enter a beauty contest who radiate warmth and love and joy in every situation they engage in. They are the people who are truly beautiful to me.

I think it's past the time we need to start learning to put more love into our self. When those negative thoughts and voices enter our heads, we need to remember that they're just noise. We're all beautiful people, whether we're models or sewer treatment specialists. It's time that we learn to appreciate the beauty inside, and let that be the image we project to the rest of the world. It's a beautiful thing that should never be hidden.

And in addition to tuning in to model's and fashion shows, let's also make the choice to watch and support those outside of the mainstream fashion world. Volunteer some time at a soup kitchen or with habitat for humanity. Visit a senior center or a youth shelter. You'll get the chance to witness the beauty that comes from within, and the light inside you will glow a little bit brighter too.

As a final thought, to those friends of mine who will read this, you are beautiful! Don't ever let outside forces (or your mind) tell you otherwise. I look at you and know you and see a bright spirit residing in each of you. It's the image I see, and I hope that when you look in the mirror each day it's what you see too.

What I'm Listening to Wednesday

It's that time of the week again! I've been listening to quite a bit of music this week, but I've managed to focus all that I've been enjoying into a top five for this week. And I've added them to my WILTW playlist on spotify, so feel free to check them out if you'd like the audio reference!

1. Banditos- The Refreshments
Last Friday out of nowhere this song popped into my head. I can't remember now what the trigger was, but I'm so glad that it happened. Quite possibly it was the song lyric "Everybody knows, that the world is full of stupid people." I may have had an exposure to one, and thankfully the reaction was thinking of this song and not doing something less polite. Jana and I used to listen to this song on repeat back in the day. She had the CD, but we both enjoyed it. Hearing it today still makes me happy.

2. Apartment-Young the Giant
Young the Giant are a relatively new band who've been getting more exposure this year. They have some catchy tunes and from what I've seen are also pretty great live. They performed this year on the MTV music awards and caught my ears. I downloaded their full album and I'm glad I did. The opening song on the disc is "Apartment," and I catch myself singing this song in my head on a regular basis. Definitely something to check out. Plus, Young the Giant are performing in Des Moines in March of next year, and I really hope to go.

3. I Smile- Kirk Franklin
I first heard this song earlier this year on the American Idol finale. Jacob Lusk performed it with Kirk Franklin and I thought, what a nice song. I downloaded the original version, and like the title states, when I listen to the song, I do smile. :) See, it's contagious. :) There are many positive lyrics in this song, and you can't help but feel better when you listen to it. I dare you to listen to it and not feel better by the end of the song. It's perfect for Monday mornings, rainy days, or any time you need a pick me up.

4. Something Stupid- The Secret Sisters
I've recently discovered the Secret Sisters and I'm captivated by them. The Secret Sisters are Laura and Lydia Rogers, and they are classified as country/americana music. I classify them as awesome. The duo have incredible harmonies and their album mixes original songs with covers. Their cover of Something Stupid is one of my favorites on their album.

5. For Today- Jessica Lea Mayfield
I discovered Jessica Lea Mayfield from a free download on I-tunes earlier this Spring. I thought her song was pretty interesting, and when Craig and I heard she would be performing at 80/35 I decided I wanted to see her live. She was definitely one of the highlights of the festival for me. She has a gorgeous, sometimes haunting voice and she has beautiful eyes too. Her performance at 80/35 made me a true fan, and I haven't stopped listening to her since. During her performance, technical difficulties caused the sound to be cut. Rather than letting this end the show, Jessica just went and sat on the edge of the stage, the crowd moved in closer, and she played accoustically and sang. It was a beautiful moment and I'm so glad I was able to experience it. Last night, I managed to catch the majority of the Americana Music Festival on IPTV. The festival was taking place as Craig and I were leaving Nashville on our honeymoon. Jessica was one of the performers, and she sang "For Today." It was my favorite performance of the show. Please give her a listen. I think you'll be impressed. And if you aren't, I'm still going to listen to her on repeat. :)

Realists vs. Dreamers

Happy Thanksgiving Eve!

I'm very excited that tomorrow I get to celebrate my favorite of all holidays. As I like to say "What could be better than Thanksgiving? You get to eat and say Thank you. What else do you need?"

I was going to write a post about being thankful, which I may still do, but TV viewing this evening has changed my focus. Craig and I enjoyed a nice evening at home this evening hanging out and watching some TV. We're late to the party, but we've discovered that we really enjoy Modern Family. We have a DVR full of episodes that we need to catch up on, but this evening we were able to watch the new episode.

For those of you who watch but haven't seen tonight's episode, this blog contains "spoilers," so you may need to stop reading now until you've seen the episode.

Now that I've given my disclaimer, tonight's episode focused around Thanksgiving, and began with a former neighbor of Phil and Claire's coming to visit. The nieghbor had become quite successful for taking risks and is now an entrepenuer with his hands in several different businesses. He made a statement that when faced with a decision, he would ask what Phil would do in that situation, and then he'd do it.  This set up the basic premise of the entire episode.

Claire was focusing on getting the Thanksgiving dinner and festivities together in her typical Type A style. She needed Phil to get things together for the dinner, and each time he'd come up with a unique or creative idea she would have to shoot him down and get him to do what she wanted for the dinner. Phil came to decide that Claire was squashing all of his creativity.

In a side plot line, Cam was feeling upset after he told his famous "Chuckin Punkin" story and Mitchell told him it wasn't a believable story and he shouldn't waste people's time telling some of his stories. Cam felt like Mitchell didn't support him and didn't believe his stories were true.

And in the third side story, Jay and Gloria argued over whether Manny needed to hear constructive criticism after creating a Thanksgiving centerpiece. Jay didn't think the centerpiece was one of Manny's better projects, but Gloria praised him and told Jay she had always been put down by her mother and she didn't want Manny to hear anything negative as it would break his spirit.

All three plot points were played out quite nicely with several big laughs, as they typically are on the show. The culmination of all three story points came to a head at the Thanksgiving dinner, as the Pritchett family members took the side of the realists, while their respective spouses/families took the role of the dreamers. When Cam made a comment about his Chuckin Punkin story, which all of the family had heard several times, Cam mentioned that Mitchell didn't believe this story could actually have taken place. So to settle it once and for all, the family decided to go and "chuck" a pumpkin to see if it truly could have flown clear across a football field.

In the end of course, the pumpkin didn't fly as far as Cam had always said it did. But instead of gloating about being right, the Pritchett's realized they didn't feel good proving the dreamers wrong, and ended up encouraging them to keep trying to make it happen. With their combined efforts the pumpkins flew farther and farther.

I think this is a great message to be reminded of from time to time. I think that in most situations I have a decent balance of dreamer and realist in my decision making process. I'd like to say that in most situations though the dreamer side of me wins out. Craig and I discussed this and he is definitely more of a realist, but he has his dreamer moments too. When we work together we often end up successful.  There was a great line in the show tonight that basically said " The realists are there to keep the dreamers from flying directly into the sun, and the dreamers are there to help the realists get off the ground."

This has me thinking about what are the dreams I have that I'm not trying to make happen because I'm letting the reality of the situation get in the way, and also about the things that I could improve by dreaming a bit more than I do now. I wonder what I could accomplish by realizing my dreams, and I wonder what my followers could do if they followed their dreams too. What an exciting world we'd live in if we all stopped just thinking about our dreams and started making them happen.

But to keep myself balanced, I think I'll keep my realist around. If nothing else, he'll be there to celebrate with me when I do accomplish my dreams. :)

Apple Donut

Sometimes I like to use my blog for the random moments that happen in life. One such moment happened today, and I’m going to share it with you.

 As I was heading to my morning break today, my friend Jenny waved me over to her desk. She had donuts from Krispy Kreme at her desk and she offered one to me.  There were several to choose from. One of the donuts had a cut down the middle of it, and she presented the donut as “being totally fine.” Our friend Meggin had a curiosity about the filling of the donut, so she cut it in half to find out what it was. Jenny said that no one was interested in taking the apple-filled donut because it now had a cut through the middle of it.  I decided that was the donut I would choose. Jenny told me she was sure it would be good. I told her I would provide her with a review, and she said I should blog about it.

 Never one to back down from a challenge, I’m now blogging about the apple-filled donut.  It was quite delicious. I would recommend them to others.  It had a cinnamon/powdered sugar coating, and of course the apple filling in the middle.  I guess it’s a reminder of the “don’t judge a book by it’s cover” variety. I could have chosen a better looking donut, but then I’d have missed out on the delicious option I chose.  So now I’ve not only blogged about the donut, but I’ve made it a little life lesson.

What I'm Listening to Wednesday 11-16-2011

I’m a little behind schedule on getting this posted, but hopefully you can forgive me.  I’m listening to a random mix of music again this week. I’ve also recently discovered Spotify, which has helped me discover some new music as well as re-connect with some old favorites.  It’s a great service, and if you have it, you’re in for a treat. I’ve created a “What I’m Listening To Wednesday” play list with my Spotify account! If you’re a member, you can access my playlists and hear the songs I’m referencing.  I think it’s a fun way to make my blog a little more interactive.

 Here are my picks for this week.

 1.       Rumour Has It/ Someone Like You (mash up) – Glee Cast By now you are all aware that I am a bona fide Gleek, and this week’s episode was really good! There was humor, there was drama, and some great music. Glee has done several mash-up songs during their time on air, and most of them have been pretty clever and entertaining. This week’s episode actually featured four mash-ups, and the Adele mix is by far my favorite! Two of the most powerful singers in the cast, taking on two big-voiced soulful tracks together made for a mash-up of epic proportions. I can’t stop playing this! And from the I-tunes sales records, I’m not the only one. This song also happened to be the 300th performance on Glee since its beginning, so it holds a little place in Gleek history too!

 2.       Otis- Jay-Z & Kanye West I know this song isn’t “new” at this point, but it’s such a stellar track that I keep finding it in regular rotation for me. It’s a great mixture of classic and contemporary, and the beat is insane! As soon as the bass kicks in on this song I want to drum on the closest available surface. Otis Redding is a soul legend, so to hear his rich, melodic voice is always a treat. Combine that with the hard and fast rhymes of two of the biggest names in hip-hop/rap right now, and you’re bound to have a hit. Just listen to it and tell me you won’t walk around singing “na na na” in your head.

 3.       Lucky One- Amy Grant I know you’re probably scratching your head on this one and thinking “one of these things is not like the other.” I realize this wouldn’t be an obvious choice of a song I’d be listening to on repeat. But I am. So there.  Yesterday one of my co-workers was looking for a supervisor, and when she found one that was available she said “Ah, you’re the lucky one.”  Instantly that phrase triggered memories of this song for me, and I was taken back to the days when I worked in radio, way back in high school.  I started humming the tune and looked it up on my Spotify as soon as I got home. It makes me smile and it makes me nostalgic, so it’s on the list this week.  This was a hit on the Leeza Gibbons Adult Contemporary Countdown, and gosh darn if it doesn’t hold a little place in my heart.:)


 4.       Midnight City- M83 Completely changing gears, this next song I actually discovered from the latest Victoria Secret’s commercial. Yep, I find my music just about anywhere. I had heard the brief clip of this song and thought it had a cool, electronic/industrial tone to it. I did a little research and found out who was performing the song, and I looked it up. It’s very atmospheric and interesting to listen to. Their most recent album is a two-disc set, and there are several stand out songs in the mix.  I of course listened to them on Spotify, and they’re now on my list for future purchasing.

 5.       Shake It Out- Florence + the Machine Florence Welch is so cool! By now you have probably heard of Florence + the Machine, or at least have heard some of their music.  The band recently released a new album called “Ceremonials,” and it’s receiving heaps of critical praise. And for good reason. The album freakin’ rocks! Florence Welch has a very soulful yet ethereal quality to her voice, and her range is incredible. The song “Shake it Out” is a stand out track from the new album, and it’s got a classic F+TM vibe to it. By the time she gets to the soaring chorus, you feel surrounded by the anthemic qualities of the song. It’s definitely worth checking out if you haven’t done so yet.

  And there you have it.  Next week may be the last week of music that doesn’t include any holiday selections. I am refusing to listen to Christmas music before Thanksgiving, but as soon as the holiday is over, all bets are off. J With new holiday music being released by She & Him and Glee, you know I’ll probably have something to say about it.  Happy listening!

Identity crisis

I’ve been having trouble getting time to write my blog over the last few days, but I had a free moment and wanted to sit and share my thoughts.  Over the past few days I’ve had reminders of the impact society has on the way we act. I find it somewhat puzzling that we allow this to happen, but I know I’m just as guilty as the next one when it comes to it.  My first example of this comes from last Friday.

  On Veterans Day, my sister and I decided to volunteer our time for the community. My brother-in-law was in the Marines, and I have other friends and family who have served our country, and I couldn’t think of a better way to honor them than by doing something to give to others. We decided to help set up displays at Water Works Park for the Jolly Holiday Lights festivities that will start soon.  The Jolly Holiday Lights is an annual fundraiser for the Make-A-Wish foundation, and proceeds from the event go towards the granting of these wishes. I think this is such an amazing cause and organization, so I was more than happy to help.

 Our volunteer job that day consisted of helping assemble the various light-up displays that people drive through and view.  The displays are made of piping and wire and of course lots of lights. As these displays can be rather large, they aren’t stored in one piece, but broken down into smaller sections that are later assembled for display.  We met with our volunteer crew to travel around the park and put the displays together.  Upon meeting our crew leader, he gave a chuckle at us, and said “You two have never done this before, have you?”  I don’t know if he was implying that we were wearing the wrong clothes, didn’t have the right tools, or what exactly, but it doesn’t give the best first impression.

 After a quick explanation of what we would be doing, we set right into getting the displays put together. Our main task was to assemble the sections together, so a lot of bolt and screw tightening and loosening would be the task of the day. This sounds simple enough, but at times my sister and I both found this to be a challenge. Some of the bolts were very tight on the piping, and others were somewhat stripped and difficult to tighten into place. But faced with the task, we both jumped right in to help where we could and never complained about it.

 After putting together maybe half a dozen displays or so, our volunteer leader said “You must have a desk job.” I jokingly replied “Is it that obvious?” but inside I admit I was a bit annoyed.  Yes, I work at a desk every day. I don’t claim to be a pro when it comes to carpentry, mechanics and similar tasks. Regardless of that, I’m still willing to try it out and do what I can to help, especially when I know it’s for a good cause. As all of this was happening though, I began to question my “manliness.” It’s silly of me to do, but it’s something that happens from time to time. Certain social settings or situations can cause me to feel inadequate in some way. I know in my heart that I’m not, but I still admit to feeling that pressure from society to fit the norm of what people think I should be.

 I can also feel this pressure from groups in which I do “belong.”  Being a gay man, it’s often perceived that I have a knack for decorating and art. While I can tell you whether something looks nice or not, I’d never claim myself to be an interior designer.  I recall an experience a few years ago where I was asked to wrap several boxes to serve as a holiday display for an employer. I can get wrapping paper on a box, but it’s not going to be pretty. One of my co-workers noticed me struggling to get one of the boxes covered. Her response was, “isn’t that like second nature to you?”  Again I replied jokingly that I must have skipped that class during my training.

  Upon reflection of all of this, I realize that in each of these situations, I had a choice to throw in the towel or not proceed with what I was doing because I wasn’t a natural at it, but I chose instead to go for it anyway. I could let the pressure I felt from my peers debilitate me into only doing the things I’m comfortable with, or I could do it anyway and prove to myself that I don’t have to fit into the mold others may try to put me in.  I know that it’s not just me who feels this way either.

 Stereotyping and gender role issues affect everyone. A few days ago Craig was telling me that several of his co-workers had been to see “Wicked” over the weekend.  He said that everyone enjoyed it, but the men in his office had a really hard time admitting that they had even gone to the show, let alone that they had enjoyed it. I’m sure that a lot of this was due to the idea that if they admit they enjoyed a musical, that must somehow make them less of a man or something. I often wonder what we miss out on in life because we’re too afraid to experience something different. The fear of being labeled into a stereotype can be a really crippling thing, and I think that’s unfortunate.

  I know this affects women too. If a woman wants to play sports she can be labeled “too butch.” If she wants to be healthy and manage her weight she can be “anorexic.” A woman who’s married and doesn’t have children must “have something wrong with her.”  None of these statements are true. If you view history and see what women have been able to accomplish by standing up and trying new things, you get an excellent example of just how amazing we can be as a society if we make the effort.

 I know that it’s difficult to change behaviors, especially those that have long been present and accepted by the general public. I also think that when you’re willing to be a little more open-minded, and to stop perceiving things the way you’ve always been taught to do so, that you open your world to an entire new set of possibilities. Strike up a conversation with someone who doesn’t fit your normal comfort zone.  Do something in your life that doesn’t follow the daily routine. I think if we all were willing to make a small step or two into something a bit out of our bubbles, we’d start a force that can change the way we live and interact with each other.  You may learn a new talent you didn’t even realize you had, and you might make new friends too.

Supportive parents

I'm sitting here on my couch this morning listening to the soundtrack to the musical "Aida." Last night, Craig and I were fortunate enough to get to see a performance of this musical at Lincoln High School here in Des Moines. Our good friend Jennie's son Matt was in the show and we went to cheer him on. Plus Craig and I enjoy watching a good musical if you can imagine that, so we were more than happy to attend.

The show was really good! I was fairly unfamiliar with the story and music, so it was a new experience for me. Many of the lead performers in the show had fantastic voices and did and excellent job of transporting me to Egypt for a few hours. The lead actress playing the character "Aida" was especially good and captivating.

After the performance we went out into the hallway to congratulate Matt and the cast. I was fortunate enough to run into the young actress who played Aida, and I told her to never stop singing, because she had such a beautiful voice. Her face lit up in a smile and she was very genuine in her thanks and support of the show. She also told us this was her very first experience in performing in a show or in front of a crowd. I was impressed with her poise and maturity even more after hearing that. Then our friend Jennie asked if the girl's family was there to see the show tonight. The girl said that he family was not in attendance that night. She said her mom hadn't been feeling well but she planned on making it the next day.  I have to admit my heart just about broke when she said that. We congratulated her again for her performance and told her when her mom got to see her she was going to be so proud.

As Craig and I were walking to the car I was telling him how I was so surprised and shocked to hear that no one from this girl's family was able to attend the show to support her. Craig said he had heard other students making similar comments after the show, how they didn't have family there that night to support them either. I was really dismayed by hearing that and got to wondering how many of these young talents were there performing without the support of their family.

I have to provide some background at this point, because I imagine I might seem a bit off mark compared to the standard. My sister and I were both involved in the school musical and drama performances. We grew up in a smaller town, where every member of the school chorus was able to perform in the fall musical. We also were able to land roles in the spring play on several occassions through our involvment in the drama club. And at each and every show, my parents were in attendance.

My parents were neither one greatly involved in these activities when they were in school. My mom sang but never had aspirations to play the lead in a show. My dad is a typical dad who wouldn't actively pursue theater or musical performances. Yet at every show we were involved in, my parents were in the audience. During the combined years of school between my sister and I, we performed in 18 school musicals, and my parents attended all 18 shows. In my sister's senior year of high school she played the narrarator in "Little Shop of Horrors." The narrarator of the show had one line, the opening line of the show. She didn't even appear on stage, but spoke the line from the orchestra pit. And even then my parents attended every show.

So I come from a family that was very supportive of my sister and I's artistic endeavours. Because of this I probably have a spoiled view of what I I think should be the norm when it comes to supporting students and the arts. Not only did my parents support our efforts in choir and theater, but my parents were the parents who were supportive and involved in basically everything that my sister or I were involved in during school and beyond. If parents were needed to work a concession stand for a football game or a speech contest, my parents were there. If a chaperone was needed for a school band trip, my mom was sitting there on the bus. They watched cross country and track meets in the rain, snow and cold. We even travelled to Florida to watch my sister perform with the drill team at the Citrus bowl.

My parents fit into the role of parents for many of my sister and I's friends over the years as well. Hearing "your parents are so cool," was a common phrase from our friends and classmates. I admit at the time I found that more annoying than a compliment, but of course at the time I was a typical high school student who just wanted to have some alone time. In hindsight though, I realize just how incredibly lucky I was. When friends or classmates were saying "your parents are so cool," they were saying that it was cool to see parents involved in their kids lives and interests. My parents certainly weren't the only parents who were supportive on this level, but it made an impact on those students who didn't have someone there to support and cheer them on. And it made an impact on me.

My parents weren't "helicopter parents," but they were cheerleaders. They were the backstage crew who often went unnoticed. They were the booster club, the director's assistant, the team photographer and the craft services staff all wrapped into one. I honestly think if my parents, and the other parents who chose to get involved hadn't done so, the show definitely wouldn't have gone on.

As I think about the young girl who performed last night without any family support in the audience, I recognize that my parents will never receive the thanks they deserve for all of the support they give. I know that I can never truly thank them enough, but I can lead by their example. I don't have my own children at this time, but I can support the children of my other friends and family. When you go and watch a school musical, or cheer on the local sports team, or volunteer to work in the concession stands for the speech club, you're telling those students "I believe in you." You send a message to those students that says "what you are doing is important and meaningful."

I understand that parenting is difficult. It's a struggle in this day and age to be able to work, to support a family and to still pursue your own dreams. I watch friends of mine make decisions to miss their favorite TV show to go and work with the PTA, to give up a night of relaxing to watch a school production. I have friends who give up their free time on the weekend to travel with a sports team or to chaperone a youth group outing. I witness these examples of selflessness and I'm reminded of my parents.  I know that to this day if I were to be involved in an activity or club, my parents would find a way to support the cause. And if they couldn't be there in person they'd still find a way to show their support, whether by providing supplies, donating funds, or by making sure someone from our family was there to show support in their place.

So if you're a parent, please consider the positive impact you make for your children when you choose to support them and their classmates in their endeavours. If you're not a parent, think about how you can still show support to the many talented students out there who would love to have an audience cheering them on. The high school student you root for today may be the Tony winner of tomorrow.

What I'm Listening To Wednesday (Vol. 2)

Can you believe it's already been a week since I last posted my top five current songs I can't stop listening to? A lot happens in a week, but that's all good for me. I will tell you that this week's selections are all fairly mainstream, and several are on the radar from the last 24 hours, so these are truly what I'm currently listening to at the moment.  Without further ado...

1. Keep Me In Mind: Zac Brown Band

I have to thank my beautiful sister for this one. She has provided me with the most recent ZBB album, and this is definitely a stand out for me. I love the country/funk/soul vibe of the song, and I'm really enjoying the use of the strings on this one. The harmonies are beautiful and the chorus has been in my head most of the day today. I'm a bit bummed that he's going to be in Des Moines soon for his tour and I don't have tickets. I'm still trying to win them though, so maybe I'll get to hear him live! If not, I'll just listen to the CD the night of the concert and pretend. :) And I'll save money towards a future house, so it's all good.

2. I'm Goin' Down: Mary J. Blige.

Once again my man Marcus Canty on the X-Factor sang the song that I can't stop listening to this evening. Last week it was Bobby Brown, and this week he sang an excellent rendition of this song. Originally by Rose Royce, the version I know and love is the cover done by Mary J. The raw passion and intensity of her voice on this song is rarely matched by artists these days, and this is a classic. Definitely worth adding to your library if it's not already there.

3. I'm Gonna Love You Through It: Martina McBride

Thanks for making me burst into tears Martina. I've always enjoyed Martina, but I have to admit I'd never really listened to her latest single until she performed it tonight on the CMA awards. Right there looking gorgeous as always is Martina, singing about a woman who is diagnosed with breast cancer, and who's husband is there for her while she's scared and afraid, and he says "I'm gonna love you through it." Of course the only thing I can think of is my mom and my dad and how they went through this very situation, and how my dad did love my mom through it, and is here on the other side with her still loving her every day. And now I'm going to get all weepy again, so maybe I'll stop listening to this one for a minute. But do check it out. Martina McBride is amazing.

4. You Can't Win: Kelly Clarkson

The new Kelly Clarkson album is great, and I like to listen to it while I'm getting around for the day. She's once again shown why she was the first and the best. This song is a pop-guitar driven song with a unique message. It's a song about all of the different ways in which no matter what you do you just feel like you can't win. I understand that sounds like a pretty downer sort of theme, but this song never gets me down. Every time I hear this song I identify with it, I'm energized, and I feel like it's Kelly's way of saying "No matter what you do there will always be someone who wants to say you can't win, so just be you and don't worry about it." At least that's the message I get from it.

5. America (from West Side Story): Glee Cast

Ok, this choice might seem slightly out of left field, but you should know by now that I love Glee! And, this week we were given two great solo moments from Naya Rivera, who's voice is just stunning to me. My friend Meggin said today " I just want Santana to walk around and sing West Side Story songs, always." I would not be opposed to that! This song is catchy, and it gets me excited for the live performance of West Side Story that is coming to the Civic Center in a few months. I can't wait to see it!

So there are my picks for this week. They're all pretty up beat, minus the Martina McBride song, but they're all making for an interesting little play list this evening. :)

It's one month!

And what a great month it has been! It's hard to believe that just one month ago, on a beautiful Saturday, I married the man I never thought I'd meet. I know I'm not the first person to make a statement like that, but that doesn't make it any less true. I can remember so many times in the last decade or so when I thought it would be much easier to just throw in the towel. If you've dated, and I imagine most of you have, dating can really suck sometimes. I too have my share of horror stories. Some are pretty humorous, and some are just sad. For the sake of not dragging things through the mud I won't say anything more on that, but maybe sometime I'll give you some insight on that.

There's always been something about Craig that has drawn me to him, and I've known it from the first time I met him. We actually first connected with each other through an online personal ad. Honestly, I had forgotten that I had an ad out for public view when I got a response from Craig. I remember it well though. I had actually been out celebrating Des Moines pride weekend, and I was supposed to be meeting a guy. I got stood up that Saturday night, and I was dejected to say the least. Rejection never feels good. I went out again on Sunday for the festivities anyway, but I was out with friends and not worrying about any possible connection. I did get a text message from the guy who stood me up, and his lame excuses were enough to send me home. In a funk, I thought I'd check my e-mail. And there, among the spam and jokes was a message stating that my personal ad had been viewed. With hesitation I opened the message, and the rest, they say, is history. :)

Dating and personal sites are a mixed bag. I don't put them down, as they eventually did work for me, but I know the frustration of getting less than stellar results too. So many people, in my experience, were just looking for a casual friend or hook up. My typical response to that was, "and then what?" I've always thought I'd have a relationship like my parents have had now for 35 years. Now that I've met Craig, I believe that dream has become a reality.

Craig and I are similar in some ways, and very different in others. I think that is what helps us stay so positive through everything. I have very few qualms about sharing my emotions, while Craig is usually reserved. I enjoy a good night of reality and comedy TV, where Craig would prefer watching a History channel special. I despise people talking at me in the morning, at least before I've had a few cups of coffee. Craig sets his alarm to play NPR as a wake up. Yet in other ways we're perfectly matched. We both enjoy concerts. We have a strong love of family and friends. We both feel that contributing to the community we live in is important. So in our relationship I feel we're truly blessed to match up so well.

So now I'm going to end this short little posting to go and wish him sweet dreams. Craig turns into a pumpkin around 10, and I'm a night owl.  But we both sleep sweetly knowing we're together for life.

A spiritual Sunday

Good evening to all of those out in the blogosphere.  I'm going to give the disclaimer right at the beginning here that this post is going to be somewhat touchy-feely, philosophized and what not. If your mind isn't in the place to handle more serious and thought-provoking topics this might not be your favorite post of mine. I also understand that I may provide some thoughts and opinions that may seem controversial or different from others. We're all adults here and I think we're mature enough to handle it. I have had a really great day though and I want to share with everyone, so here goes.

I am a member of Plymouth Church here in Des Moines. It's a wonderful place and I am truly blessed to be a member. I have been a member just over a year and a half at this point and it's been one of the most rewarding experiences I've encountered. I can't say that I've been a model member and I've probably missed more sermons than I've attended, but I'm a work in progress and I'm feeling more driven to be connected, and I think that's a good thing.

I should probably give some background before I go further with my discussion for today. I grew up in a church-going family. I was raised in a Baptist home and attended the local baptist church in my hometown. And when I say I attended, I mean that I was there just about every possible time that I could be there. A typical week for me began with Sunday school , followed by Sunday service, then youth group and Sunday evening service. Tuesday mornings I would go to church youth breakfast before schools. Most Wednesday nights I would attend a youth group meeting or Wednesday evening service, and if there was a youth group event going on for the weekend I was there Friday or Saturday as well.

I know that many of the beliefs and ideals that I follow today came from this exposure and upbringing. I don't regret any of the time I spent involved in my church family and I am glad that my family chose to bring me up in this manner. But, I can also say that from an early age I remember finding discrepancies with how I felt about life and how I was being taught to view life. Many times I came home from a sermon or class feeling like there was something out of sorts. It just felt like the golden rule wasn't being followed, and it was more about how I needed to be converting people to my way of thinking instead of respecting and appreciating the diverse population we live in. It seemed like anyone who was "different" was either "in the wrong" or in some kind of cult. It also didn't help that by this time I was starting to wonder whether I myself was who I had been pretending to be, and if you've ever felt like you had to be someone else in order to fit in then you know where I'm coming from. Please understand though that this is my experience only, and I know that others may have felt differently in the same situation. I'm not trying to bad mouth anyone here, but simply give my perspective on the situation.

Getting out of that environment and heading to college was very beneficial for me in a lot of ways. I learned to start questioning what I had always been told and to start forming my own ideas. Some of the principles I'd been brought up on still held, but meeting others and getting new veiwpoints really helped me to broaden my horizons and to gain valuable life experience I had been missing out on. I was also able to finally come to terms with myself and my identity, and that was a big relief. Unfortunately once I realized that I was who I was, most of my connection with the church and my upbringing had to be put to the side. It's very tough to feel excluded from something you've always felt a connection to just because you want to be yourself. I couldn't imagine being a member of a church who would condemn me for being who I was or who would try to "correct" what they felt was an issue.

It took a long time for me to start trusting in God again because of this experience. It wasn't until I met Craig that I began to realize what I had been missing in my life for such a long time. One of the first things about Craig that really appealed to me was his connection to his family, and to his active involvement in church. Craig mentioned very early on in our relationship that he belonged to Plymouth church. I had heard a little about Plymouth, and recognized the name from some of their advertisements. They are very vocal about saying that "all are welcome," and when I met Craig, someone who was "like me" who was a member, I decided to give it a chance.

I remember the first time I went to Plymouth with Craig. I was a bit overwhelmed really, in the best sense of the word.  I was back in a church, I hadn't burst into flames, and I was really enjoying myself. I got a good message from the sermon that morning, and I remember meeting one of the pastor's after the service. He made me feel genuinely welcomed, and it was enough to get me back. Craig and I continued to attend services, and after a few months I decided that I was ready to make the next step and become a member. It was a beautiful and overwhelming moment for me, and I was blessed to have my family and Craig's family there as I made the committment.

After becoming a member and feeling so confident, God decided to throw some tests at Craig and I. My mom and aunt battled breast cancer (and won!) and Craig's mom fought a valiant battle with pancreatic cancer. Craig also lost his grandmother during that time, and there were days where I asked "what next, God?" But as things always do, with time and patience I was reminded that even though I may not understand the plan, or the reasoning behind it, there's always a plan in place.

Ok, so a little background ended up being quite a bit of information, but I think it will be helpful in the long run if you understand where I've been and where I'm coming from. I'm now caught up to my great day today. First, we went to Sunday morning service to her our pastor Matt give a sermon. This was especially good because I had a small part in helping put the sermon together. Matt is currently working on his doctorate, and he's asked some different church members to serve on a committee to help him to examine a more vulnerable style of preaching. It's interesting to have the behind the scenes aspect of putting a sermon together. Matt has also introduced me to a form of meditation and reflection on written text which has been really rewarding.

After the sermon we had a meeting of the committee to discuss what worked about the sermon and the message. It's always interesting to get the different perspectives of the group from a message that we all heard at the same time. I left the meeting feeling spiritually connected, and as it was such a beautiful fall day in November, I decided to go and enjoy it. Craig had plans with his brother and I had the afternoon to myself. I drove to downtown Des Moines, got a cup of coffee, and found a nice bench in the sunshine. I sat and read for a while, and then just sat and reflected on so many of the blessings I have in my life. It was a really great moment and I'm so happy I got to enjoy that today. The small moments of peace in the day can be the most rewarding I think.

Those moments alone were rewarding, but to top that off tonight we went to a "Fan the Flame" dinner at Plymouth. Over the last year or so the church has been looking at a plan to help strengthen the church experience and to help us move to the next level. We got to sit with several members I'd never had the pleasure to meet and we got to hear the vision that Plymouth has planned for the future. It was so inspiring and energizing. It makes me want to be more involved.

Craig and I also had a personal, moving experience during the evening's presentation. One of the goals of our new plan is to develop more "small group" experiences, where Plymouth members can get together to really know each other personally and spiritually. As a small group exercise, we got to talk with the other members at our tables about the plans and what excited us or what gave us concerns. We also got to share something that we counted as a blessing from Plymouth in the past year. Craig and I both said, without a doubt, that our biggest blessing was having Matt marry us and knowing that our church family welcomed and accepted us as a married couple.  When the presenter called us back to order she asked if anyone was willing to share their blessing with the group. With the encouragement of our table mates, I stood and shared our blessing. I was overwhelmed by emotion, but it was so incredible to see so many loving and supportive faces and to hear cheers and applause from so many of our church family members. I was definitely moved by the spirit in that moment. I do count it as a blessing to be a member of a church that accepts me for who I am when so many others wouldn't give me the time of day.

So that's the vibe I'm feeling right now. I feel like I'm in a really good place and that I'm truly blessed. I don't claim to have the answers or that I'm following the "right" path for everyone, but for me I know that at Plymouth I'm truly at home. If you'd ever like to come visit, please let me know. You are truly welcome there.

Random Saturday thoughts

So here I am on a Saturday night sitting at my lap top and feeling the urge to blog. I haven't blogged the last two days, mainly due to just being worn down and not full of thoughts, but today I'm feeling more inspired. Granted, it's a lot of random thoughts and inspiration, but sometimes those are the best kind.

It's funny how getting married and getting older will change your perspective. Earlier tonight Craig and I went out for dinner with our dear friends Erin and Aaron. As always, we had a wonderful time chatting and spending time together. They are the type of friends who you can easily have a meaningful conversation with one moment and then laugh about something silly the next. Anyway, after dinner we decided to go ahead and call it a night. As Craig and I were driving home he mentioned how we can't forget to turn our clocks back tonight. I looked at the clock on the car dashboard and it said 9:54. I thought to myself, if we turned back the clock now, it would be 8:54. And then I thought it wouldn't matter, as I'd still prefer to be home and in my pajamas. Then I remembered that years ago I would live for the fall back daylight savings night because it meant an extra hour to be out having fun. How times change. :)

I do look forward to the fall back daylights savings day. If I could make it a holiday I think I would. I know there are people who complain about it, but what could be bad about an extra hour? I know that scientifically it's really not an extra hour, but I like to imagine it is anyway. I'm always happy in the fall when I get an extra hour of sleeping, and I'm always annoyed in the spring when that hour is taken away from me.

Craig and I had a pretty good day today. We were lazy this morning and didn't put much effort towards getting around. We finally did though, and after running bank errands we went and had breakfast, and then went to the library. I think the library is a wonderful place and I enjoy visiting. I never leave empty handed either. Lately I've been rediscovering my love of the library through their music selection. After we returned from our honeymoon in Nashville, I wanted to re-connect with some country music that I used to listen to way back in the day. The library has been a great place to do that. Also, as we're now on a "let's buy a house" budget, my I-tunes budget has diminished to basically zero, so having an outlet to still get new music, even if it's only for a three week time period, is much appreciated. The library is definitely what I am thankful for today.

I also spent about an hour trying to find something interesting to read. Now, I don't know why I felt the need to do so, as I have a nook full of books that I want to read. I suppose it was just being in the environment with so many books readily available. It may also have been because the last few books I've read have ended up being duds, and I wanted to find something better.  When I was at the library a few weeks ago I picked up a book that I guess classifies as "Steampunk" science fiction. It started out interesting, but mid-way through the book last night the main character was drugged, had her arm and leg cut off, and was being turned into some kind of weapon/machine. I was just annoyed enough by that that I decided to give up on finishing it. It was difficult for me, as I don't like to give up on a book once I've started it, but I just decided my mind wasn't ready to follow that logic anymore. So if you have any good book suggestions feel free to pass them along. I'm always adding to my list. As for now I'm reading "Pawnee: The Greatest Town in America." I love me some Parks and Recreation.

And this, folks, is my first uploaded blog image! I'm growing up so fast. :)

Totally switching gears, I'm wondering how many of my friends/followers are Four Square users? I am not signed up for this, as I don't feel it's that necessary for me. Craig is registered with Four Square, and I think the proper title would probably be addict. It has become incredibly routine for him to check in to each and every place we go. It typically takes us an extra minute to get into any place we are going because he has to stop to check in. I've asked him what benefits he gets from this, and he says there are deals sometimes at certains shops or restaurants. I don't know that to this day he's actually earned any of these deals though. He seems to enjoy using it, but I guess I don't get the appeal.

I'm running out of things to randomly talk about tonight, so I'm probably going to end this and fall back into my book. I do have a goal for tomorrow though, and that is to figure out how to transfer our wedding photos from Craig's computer to mine. Right before the wedding I managed to drop my laptop, and in the process I either bumped or broke something in the CD drive. I can no longer get discs to register or read on my laptop, which is greatly frustrating. And as I've set all unnecessary spending funds aside to the future house fund, I can't pay to get it repaired. Our wedding photographer gave us two discs full of pictures yesterday, and I can't get them onto my laptop to share them with the world. I will figure it out though. The pictures are phenomenal and I can't wait to share them with everyone! 

What I'm listening to Wednesday

I posted a more serious blog earlier tonight, and now I'm going to post something just for fun and enjoyment. One idea I've had for my blog is to put together a regular posting regarding music that I'm listening to and would recommend to others. Most of my friends know me as the guy to approach when they want to know who sings a certain song or when they're looking for something new or interesting to listen to. Music has been such an important passion to me for as long as I can remember, and I feel good when I've introduced someone to something I enjoy.

Before I get to my suggestions for this week, a few ground rules. First and foremost, I realize that everyone is entitled to their opinion. There may be a song I enjoy that you think is utter and complete crap. I might think the same thing about a song that you like. The great thing is that this response is completely and totally ok. Another rule, for myself more than anyone, is that I don't pretend to be a music snob or pretentious about what I like. If it's a song sitting at the #1 spot on the top 40 charts, I'm not going to shun it for being too commercial. If the latest song by a "darling" of the popular critics sounds like nails on a chalk board to me, I'm not going to jump on the bandwagon just to seem cool. And a third rule, while I find most all types of music fascinating in one way or another, I'm going to limit my list to five choices a week.  This way I have to stay focused, and you and I can both keep our I-tunes budgets in check.

So let's get to the list for this week. Here are the top five songs that I am listening to on a regular basis at the moment and would suggest you check out as well.

1. Houdini- Foster the People.   Foster the People are getting a lot of attention right now for their song Pumped Up Kicks. That's a great song by them and I play that often too, but the song that I've been listening to the most from their album "Torches" is Houdini. It's got several great little hooky elements throughout it, with electronic bleeps, a killer horn section, and a very hummable falsetto element that digs into my brain and has me humming. Plus, the lyric "You gotta focus on your ability, then they can't get what they want to steal" is a pretty cool message.

2. Every Little Step- Bobby Brown. This is, for me, and old school jam from my yester-years, but still sounds just as catchy today as it did then. Contestant Marcus Canty sang this tonight on X-Factor, and as soon as he started singing " I can't sleep at night, I toss and turn, listening for the telephone," I was singing and dancing right along with him. This song makes me happy, and that's reason enough to give it another listen. It brings you back to that time when Bobby Brown was known for his music ability and not for a newspaper headline. Ah, youth.  :)

3. State of Mind-Clint Black.  Craig and I went to Nashville on our honeymoon, and ever since I've been re-discovering country music. I go through phases where I'm really able to connect with country music, and I'm certainly in that mind set these days. We've been visiting the library to borrow CD's to reconnect and discover new music. One of the discs I recently picked up was the ultimate hits of Clint Black. As I was listening to that on the way home from work today, I heard "State of Mind." I used to have this cassette back in the day, and hearing him sing the chorus "Ain't it funny how a melody, can bring back a memory" totally did that for me. I love that message and it's why I love music. And I'm glad that Clint has reminded me of that and taken me to another state of mind.

4. Up in Flames-Coldplay.  Coldplay's new album Mylo Xyloto is great, and I don't care whether you like Coldplay or not. That's my opinion and I'm sticking with it. I love the message of "Every Teardrop is a Waterfall," but the song that I've been playing most often from the new album is "Up in Flames." It's a classic Coldplay ballad with minimal flourishes. It's essentially Chris Martin, a piano, and a drum, until the guitars kick in during the last minute of the song. It's a sad song about a relationship going" up in flames," but it's beautiful to listen to anyway. This song sort of embodies the message of Every Teardrop is a waterfall, in that even though something may be sad it can also be beautiful.

5. Finally Falling-Mayer Hawthorne. If you're not listening to Mayer Hawthorne I may have to stop talking to you until you change that behavior. This man is brilliant! My friend Krista introduced me to him and honestly should be sending her daily thank you notes for the introduction. Mayer Hawthorne is one funky white guy if I say so myself. He's making great retro-throwback soul music that sounds current at the same time. His song "Finally Falling" is off his latest album "How Do You Do" and it's a catchy, up-beat song about falling in love. And as I'm still definitely on that cloud, I play this one on repeat. You should do the same.

So there are my five picks for the week. Take a listen to them if you'd like. I'll have five more for you next week for the next installment of "What I'm Listening to Wednesday."

Oh, and in case you were wondering ,today I'm thankful for incorrect weather forecasts! I believe that snow is best when it falls on December 23rd, and melts on the 26th or 27th. Otherwise I could do without it. So as the predicted snow didn't fall in Des Moines today, I'll be thankful for that. :)

Customer Service

Today I got to thinking about my job and about life and several big picture ideas. And then my mind came close to exploding and I had to take a breath and focus.  It did give me a good topic for today's blog though, so good came out of that experience.

I work for an insurance company in a client representative position. Essentially it's a type of customer service position, and this generally fits me very well, as I most of the time enjoy helping people. I've taken the Strengthsfinder test and among my strengths are communication and developer, so speaking with people and helping them if I can are right in my "sweet spot" I guess.

The down side to a position in customer service is that, like most jobs, there are some frustrations that come from time to time. I admit, I am a quasi-reformed whiner, and it would be very easy to use this blog as an attempt to whine about the frustrations I feel with my job. But, life has given me lessons over the past several years that have really helped me to gain perspective, and I'm thankful for that. It has helped me, for the most part, to keep my feelings in check and to try to find more positive ways of dealing with what bothers me. Now, I'm still human and have my moments where I slip into full on drama queen, but with age comes maturity, I hope anyway.

I've always been bothered by people who whine and complain without any action to back up their complaints. An example would be someone who rips apart a politician for the job they are doing who never bothered to vote in the first place. If you voted for the other guy and he didn't win, then go ahead and rant away. At least you made your effort to support your cause. I just get bothered when people whine about whatever injustice they are feeling and the only effort they've made to rectify the situation thus far is to open their mouth.

With that out of the way, I want to mention a few key triggers that tend to set me off in a negative way in terms of customer service, and to offer some tips that you may find helpful or that may reach that audience who's guilty of some of my offenses.  Hopefully I'm providing a positive spin on this, and in my own way possibly helping to be the change I wish to see in the world. (Sorry, I know that's a big picture concept too, but it seems to fit this situation.)

I think one of my biggest frustrations with customer service is the lack of respect for your fellow man. This offense happens daily, in many situations. When I'm feeling contemplative I often wonder where our compassion and respect for each other has gone. We so often are so quick to snap judge and decide that we're better or somehow "above" the other guy and are therefore entitled to treat them in a demeaning manner. If I'm doing a job for you, the polite thing to do is to say please and thank you, to take the time to listen to what I'm saying, to allow me the time to listen and understand what you're asking, and just in general to slow down for two seconds and appreciate that we're having some sort of human interaction.

 If we're communicating over the phone, please try to be in an environment where you're not distracted by other noises and stimuli. I understand in many instances you have a short amount of time to take care of whatever business I am assisting you with, but I promise that if you take a few moments to remove the distractions around you we'll accomplish our business in a more timely manner. You do your part, and I'll do my best to eliminate my distractions as well.

 If we're in person, please, for the love of God, put down your cell phone!  Don't get me onto my soap box on this one, because I could actually rant about this. When I'm out shopping and I'm on the phone, I will either end the call before checking out at the register, or at the very least ask whoever I'm speaking with if they mind holding for a moment while I interact with the cashier. Having been on the receiving end of this, I can't help you if you are giving all of your attention to whoever is on the other end of your phone. And sadly, I have more than one instance where I have had a cashier thank me for putting away my cell phone before interacting with them. Cashiers/employees are always appreciative when you give them your focus. Even if it's only for a few moments, it makes a big difference, and you get better service for it I promise.

Another thing that we could all improve on, similar to just giving more respect, is to understand that we aren't experts on everything. Each person out there has areas of their life that they excel in, and some where they may not be the strongest. That's part of being human. We don't know everything. I know my mind is only able to hold so much information, and usually that information is not relevant to the masses. Ask me who performed what on what reality singing competition and I'll know in an instant, but ask me about the latest local news headline and I'll likely struggle with a response. With that being said, there are times where you may ask me, or someone else in a customer service position, a question that they may not immediately know the answer to. This doesn't mean that I can't find out the information you need, or that I don't want to help you,  but I may need a moment to find the information you need. Instead of getting annoyed with me, or just being rude because I don't know something, understand that at some point this same interaction is going to happen to you, and you would hope to be given the benefit of a little patience too.

Something else that becomes irksome at times is the customer who feels the need to be cute/funny/smart with me. Don't get me wrong, I think that being silly is important, and I indulge in being silly as often as I can. There's no reason to take life too seriously. At the same time, when I'm providing you with good customer service, I'm giving you all of my attention and time. If I ask you if there is anything else I can do to help you, please respond if there is truly something I can do. I'll be glad to do what I can for you. Don't however use that question as a time to let your inner comedian come out. No, I can't give you the winning lottery numbers. If I had them I would take the selfish route and use them myself. No, I can't lower the price on whatever it may be that you're buying. If I had that authority I'd be glad to do so, but the fact of the matter is in order for any business to be successful a profit of some type needs to be made. If the price of the goods or services I offer are too expensive, use your voice and approach the competition. That gets the attention of the business much more than asking me to lower your bill. And no, I can't send you a couple of hot blondes to entertain you for the evening. That's not the kind of business I work in, and furthermore, I happen to know and respect several very attractive women (with a variety of shades of hair color) who deserve much more respect that you are giving women in general at the moment. Several of them would also knock you flat if they had the chance. My point is, if you are asked by a customer service representative how they can help or assist you, be honest and respectful. I promise you, when you give a little respect you get back that and more.

I'm sure I could list more things that can cause a negative response in me within the parameters of customer service, but I think I've touched on the big ones for me. Really it all just comes down to the golden rule. Respect one another and treat others as you would like to be treated yourself. I remind myself of this daily and hope that you do too.

So yeah, there's my deep thoughts for the day. Now that I've expressed that I think I'll put the serious mode away and focus on something less thought provoking. I'm sure I can find some reviews of tonight's X-Factor episode to read through. :)

A little bit light-hearted

Now that formal introductions are out of the way, I feel like I can post something not quite so serious. If you know me you know that I can be serious, but I'm at my best when I'm light-hearted and fun. At least that's what I think anyway. And since this is my blog, my opinion is all that really matters. :)

I'm really excited for the possibilities I have for my blog. I envision a good mix of stories, random things I find interesting, and occassionally interesting topics that I have an opinion on and want to share. I also envision having some different features that I'll incorporate to hopefully generate some conversation and comments. I'll do what I can to keep things interactive.

I thought one thing I'd like to blog about for the month of November are things that I'm thankful for. I know some people are doing "day of thanks" updates on their Face Book pages, but I'm going to post them in my blog instead. If nothing else it gives me incentive to log in and post regularly. And, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday, so if I can make it last all month long I'm for it.

Today I'm thankful for creativity. I have creative friends and a creative husband, and they inspire me to do new and exciting things and to challenge myself. For example, tonight Craig made a ramen noodle stew for dinner. He found the recipe on a budget-friendly web site for starving college kids. He doctored it up with some herbs and spices, and it was delicious. I love that he is creative and inventive with food. I also have creative friends who blog, who come up with new and exciting ideas, and that feeds my creative mind. So thank you for creativity!

Another feature that I plan on mentioning regularly is a way in which I was amazed today. In my introductory piece I mentioned that I think you should be amazed by something every day. So from time to time I'll share things that have amazed me, and feel free to share things that have amazed you too.  Today I was amazed by the weather. For November 1st, we had gorgeous sunshine and 70 degree temperatures, and I can't remember the last time that happened.

I'm starting to run out of ideas to write about at the moment, and I have some other projects I also need to work on, so I think this will be the end of my blog for tonight. I'm sure I'll have something to say again tomorrow, so feel free to stop by.

And, because it's Tuesday, and Glee was on, I'll leave you with my favorite quote from tonight's episode.

"I want to talk about that thing we never talk about."
"You mean that Sour Patch Kids are really just Gummi Bears that turned to drugs?"

:)

The Introductory Statement

There once was a man who was resting on a grassy field, taking in the sunshine and watching nature as it evolved around him. He sat drinking his coffee and running through the lists of tasks and duties set out for the day ahead.Off in the distance he heard the rumblings of a fast-moving train. The train was barreling along at a quick pace and making quite a bit of noise as it approached. As the rumblings grew louder, the man noticed the distinctive tone of the engine. What started as a low hum became clear, as if the train was carrying one singular message; Do What You Love. Do What You Love. 

The man dismissed his initial intuition and let the engine pass him by. "Surely I'm hearing things," he thought. He let the engine and the first few cars fly by him while he took a sip of his coffee. He went about his business, but he noticed that more and more cars kept passing him. All sorts of train cars, varying in size, shape and color. Some appeared traditional and bland, while others were adorned with multi-colored graffiti or a detailed mural. Occassionally a car would catch the man's eye, but it would just as quickly be replaced by the next image zooming past.

The man tried to focus on all of the other tasks and responsibilities he knew were of importance. "This train will pass soon, and I can cross the tracks and get back to work," he said to the blades of grass beside him. And he began to stare at his hands and think of the things they could accomplish. As he reflected, he realized that his hands really weren't being put to much use as they were. Sure, they did useful things, but when all was said and done, his hands appeared empty of the possibility that could fill them.

The man began to feel troubled by this lack of possibility he felt, and he noticed the train was still passing him by. "I wonder where that train is heading?" he asked. Yet still he tried to ignore the train and focus on the tasks he knew would soon need to be completed.  "Once I have crossed this off my list, I can move on to the next item, and that will give me a sense of accomplishment," he thought.  But as hard as he tried, he kept hearing the chugging of the train, still repeating it's message. Do What You Love. Do What You Love.

"That seems impractical," he said, as though saying it aloud would solidify the message in his mind. But the more he tried to deny it, the more the man kept realizing that practicality was never his strong point. And there was nothing in the rule book that said he had to be practical and not also be able to do what he loved. And then the panic started to creep in as he looked and saw the last few cars of the train beginning to come closer.

The man rose to his feet, tossed his lists aside and took off in a run towards the speeding train. "I'll never catch it," he thought as his feet flew faster and faster towards the blur in front of him. But luck was on the man's side, as he was able to reach one of the last cars before they passed out of sight. With a flying leap he jumped up and tumbled inside.

After catching his breathe and righting himself to his surroundings, he took everything in. "I have no idea where this is going to take me," he thought. "But this is a nice open car, plenty of room for me to decorate and fill it with my own characteristics."

So here I am. I've joined the blog train, before it's completed dissolved into an even more evolved way of communicating. I've always had the "better late than never" mentality though, and I know that writing has always been something I've enjoyed. I've struggled in the past with finding ways to incorporate my passion into being an adult and making useful contributions to the greater good, but with the encouragement of some wonderful friends, co-workers, and my amazing husband, I'm going to give this a try.

I can't guarantee that you'll get regular updates from me, or that they'll always be interesting or entertaining. I'm going to give it a try though. Who knows? This may be the start of something amazing. And I think it's important to be amazed by something every day.